Quick Takes 9/2!

1.

I am really doing my best to not be dead. I promise!

2.

I am absolutely in love with the clearance section at Japanese Weekend for maternity clothes. Seriously. They are awesome and the clearance and sale prices aren't awful.

3.

I am also in love with the Old Navy maternity long skirts. The weight is nice, the length is nice, and it's really comfortable. Not to bring up the skirts vs pants debate, but these skirts are comfortable enough that I actually COULD wear them all day.

4.

Glow-worm (6.0) is now just about entering 2nd trimester! I looked at the calendar and realized that my "big" ultrasound is about 6 weeks away, and I'm about 6 months away from my "victory over due date" day, and uh... eek. Especially since I tend to go over a bit, which puts me in excellent position to have an Ides of March baby.

5.

This does mean that I am getting pretty close to being able to find out whether Glow-Worm is Pink or Blue! Most of the house wants a girl, because "Thumbelina is SOOO cute!" but Yogi wants a boy because "we NEVER get baby boys..."

6.

I am absolutely dorking out reading through the really solid report from the IOM (Institute of Medicine) report on vaccine safety. The report was commissioned to be able to streamline claims for people who have suffered vaccine related adverse events, but to streamline they needed to be able to determine which events were truly vaccine related and which weren't. Wonderful 600+ page long report.

7.

3 year old check up for Baby Bear and 15 month for Thumbelina, and I think we should be able to get our flu shots too.

Check out the other 7 quick takes over at Conversion Diary!

So, um, yeah...

See, there is a reason, a VERY VERY GOOD REASON as to why I've been MIA. Try as I might, I found myself completely unable to refute (or even to desire to refute) the logic so eloquently put forth in the essay I received regarding how we ought to have another baby.



So, amid a move, a heat wave, and er... bats flying around, we are happy to announce that 6.0 will be arriving in March! All I'm saying is that Gil? I'm holding you to your promises so eloquently articulated.

7 Quick Takes!

1.

The kitchen moved to our new house today, and the full "big move" is tomorrow! We are really excited to get into our new house. :-)

2.

The fence that we were going to potentially have difficulty getting up at our new house is going up without an issue, having talked to the city.

3.

The church across the street is gorgeous, and I can't wait to get back this weekend!

4.

Sunday should be awesome, because we have a birthday party to go to for Michelle at Local Care Midwifery, and "Family Day" in our new town as well.

5.

All of the kids are really excited about the new house. I can't wait for us all to live there!

6.

For those who don't know, every Friday I offer prayers for whatever intentions I'm aware of. So, if you want to shoot me an intention, I can be reached at pregnantpapist AT gmail DOT com.

7.

My intention for this week that I'm asking everyone else to pray for as well is for Scotty, the son of Scott and Allison, who is a little older than Thumbelina. Scotty has cystic fibrosis and has been not eating enough lately, which would be somewhat concerning in any toddler but is particularly worrisome with Scotty's condition. I am praying for Scotty's health and appetite, for his very loving parents, and for a cure to this condition which as of yet can be treated but cannot be cured. To learn more about cystic fibrosis or to support cystic fibrosis research, visit the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation.

BAD BLOGGER!

So, this is what happens when you are buying a house to store your 50 gazillion eventual and 5 actual extrauterine children. Your blog gets abandoned. SO SAD.

We closed on Thursday and are moving this weekend and I promise I will try to write more soon. Anyone else doing anything exciting lately?

You know you have a large family when...

Even the two year old knows that the way to avoid bedtime is to say "Mom, I want to clean the house."

Sorry, Baby Bear. Points for creativity, but you were up with the sun and it's time for you to go to bed.

This is why I'm going to have 50 gazillion kids, Father's Day Edition 2011

There is a saying that "if momma's not happy, nobody's happy." I've been trying to think about what expression would really do justice to what Gil brings to the life of our family, and haven't been able to come to one. None of them really explain how exceptional a father Gil is.

Gil is simply a remarkable man, husband and father. He's one of the most intelligent, most principled, and funniest people I know, and he only seems to be getting better with age. The ten years we've spent as a couple and 8 1/2 we've spent tending to our brood of barbarians have been better than anything I could have ever hoped for. There aren't words to describe what it's like to watch my husband's eyes light up when our 5th child starts to play her toddler games, or to see a father giving batting advice to a 2nd grader with a two year old on his shoulders.


My children are so lucky to have such an excellent man for their Dad. Because my husband is strong, our children are strong. Because my husband is gentle, our children are kind to each other. Because my husband is steadfast, our children know peace.

If every father were one quarter of the man that my husband is, the world would be a better place. I am a better mother for being his wife, and I love him more than words can express. I am so blessed, and my children are so blessed, to have an engaged and loving Dad leading and caring for our family, and surreptitiously pricing 12 seater vans even before we've outgrown our current vehicles.

Happy Father's Day, Gil! I love you more than I'll ever be able to say, which is probably another reason as to why we're going to have 50 gazillion kids.

You know you have a large number of small children when...

You find yourself telling a 2 year old "YOU CANNOT RIDE ON PEOPLE SMALLER THAN YOU! IF YOU WANT A RIDE, FIND SOMEONE BIGGER THAN YOU TO RIDE ON!" and the 2 year old has his pick of 3 bigger siblings before even asking his mom or dad for a horseback ride.

This post brought to you by the 15th time today telling Baby Bear that Thumbelina is not for him to ride on...

Clean up, aisle 7!

You know you have boys when you bandage and ice two heads, and both victims claim to have been calmly walking while the other boy was "running, like, really fast!" One kid has a decent sized bump, the other has a pretty small gash, but as far as we can tell both of them will survive.

Putting those critical thinking skills to work!

This week I made a batch of brownies. It's been pretty hot around here lately, so once the weather cooled off I took the opportunity to *finally* catch up on some baking. You might be thinking "ummm... you have 5 kids! How on earth do you have the time to bake anything!?!" However, I submit that it's less a question of whether I have the time to bake and more a question of whether I have enough energy to NOT bake.

4 little children (Thumbelina not included) saw a tray of brownies and as their eyes lit up, the negotiations began. After a couple rounds of bidding, it was decided that to earn the brownies studded with chocolate chips and reese's pieces, the children had to scale Mount Laundry, sort it by child, and put it all away. However, there was an obstacle to the completion of this task: Thumbelina has started to "help" whenever she sees laundry, except that her "help" largely consists of picking out every single item of clothing in reach, trying to wrap it around her neck and then discarding it with impressive speed.

The horde was aware of this problem. Very aware of it. This is their solution.



Yes, that is Thumbelina in a basket full of toys piled so high that she can't get out. And yet, everybody won! Thumbelina got to sit in a basket full of toys, laundry got sorted without TODDLER SABOTAGE, and there was peace, clean clothing and peanut butter studded brownies throughout the land.

So, the question, dear readers, is not so much what baked goods will do for you as what your children will do for themselves to get the baked goods that you are offering.

Have a great rest of the weekend, everyone!

You know you need a new baby when...

Your "baby" needs to hold her baby while you nurse her.

You know you have a large number of small children when...

Your discussions about who needs to ask permission to pour a drink start to resemble discussions over gun control.

At this point one of us thinks that because there have been a high number of spills lately, a strategy must be implemented requiring all children to ask for a drink when they want one. The other parent feels that the children who ask permission are not actually those who pose the spill threat, and that those who pose a spill threat are not going to ask for permission no matter how strongly the point is emphasized because 2 year olds don't really listen that well, particularly when trying to assert their independence and ability to care for themselves.

Other moms of a large number of small kids, how do you deal with deciding who is old enough to get a drink independently and who needs to ask permission?

This is why I'm going to have 50 gazillion kids 5/27

This afternoon, Papa Bear was walking around picking up some pieces of paper that Thumbelina said to me "If we have the energy to make the mess, we have the energy to clean it up." I asked him who told him that, and he said that he made it up himself.

He then proceeded to empty the dishwasher, clean up his room, the front room, and sorted and put away all of his little sisters' laundry.

See? With kids like this, I have zero excuse, no excuse at all for not having 50 gazillion of them.

This is why I'm going to have 50 gazillion kids 5/24

Papa Bear's new thing is to start sentences "According to my calculations..." Thus far, according to his calculations, it is 133 days, 16 hours and 53 minutes until his birthday.

Also, according to his calculations,

* if she had her way Goldilocks would try to play the computer for 6 1/2 hours!
* a bag of cereal feeding 5 kids 1 serving per day should last us 6 days, then with two servings left over and he would give those last two to Goldilocks and Baby Bear while he and Yogi ate toast for breakfast.

According to *my calculations* there can never be too many kids who enjoy making calculations. That's the reason for today as to why I'm going to have 50 gazillion kids.

See this? This is absolutely, beyond a doubt why I'm going to have 50 gazillion kids

So, Thumbelina is one!  AHHH!  So, there have been ongoing discussion on when to have an offspring refresh and bring in a newer version with Horde 6.0.

Gil has taken a decidedly "pro" refresh stance, however to assuage my concerns, he wrote this lovely, profound 507 word essay.  I was moved by the beauty of the sentiments contained therein, and with his permission have decided to share it with you all.

Now that you've read through the entire thing, go back and read the first word of each line.  EPIC.  I am married to a genius, I tell you.  A genius.  What nobility of expression!  What creative joy!  What an eloquent, stirring apologetic in favor of 6.0 coming sooner rather than later.  This is the single clearest example of why I am going to have 50 gazillion kids.  A masterpiece, Gil.  An absolute masterpiece.  THIS MAN DESERVES A BRIGHT NEW SHINY BABY!

First, however, we need to close on our Dandelion Estate Upon The River, complete with enough bedrooms that even *I* am uncertain as to whether we can sufficiently fill them.  However, given sufficient space and this stirring argument in favor of BABIES, I certainly intend to try.

I'm getting worse at this

HOW CAN IT BE?!  I shouldn't be this bad at blogging!  My kids are hilarious, and I have so many of them, so why can't I actually write it down?  I might need to start doing weekly summaries of "insane things I posted on Facebook that my children did recently" because this degree of blog neglect?  Not good. Bad.  Bad Pregnant Papist Who is FAILING at living up to her name!

It's after midnight on the East Coast, which means that it is Thumbelina's very last day being "zero years old."  That's right, folks!  Thumbelina turns ONE on Wednesday!  How did this happen, you ask?  I HAVE NO FREAKING IDEA!  NONE AT ALL!

I need help, people.  I don't know what to do do celebrate her last day of being a non-1 year old, or her first day of being a 1 year old.  I mean, aside from MOAR CAKE!  Or maybe lollipops.  Thumbelina likes lollipops.  See?

Extended breastfeeding for the win!  And we win.... lollipops?  Ok, then!

This is Why I'm going to have 50 gazillion kids 3/30

We DID IT!  We survived and reached the turning point at which our older kids are able to be of substantial help in caring for the younger ones!  Papa Bear can wear Thumbelina in a Mei Tai which leaves me free to wrangle Baby Bear AND I could even push a grocery cart or climb a mountain or bake a cake or get work done for my clients or even engage in the ultimate risky behavior:  leaving my husband's socks in the same load of laundry as mine.  Now that we've reached the turning point, what exactly is our reason to NOT have 50 gazillion kids!?  I sure can't come up with one...

This is Why I'm Going To Have 50 Gazillion Kids 3/16/2011

Teachable moments, like...

Papa Bear made up a game where some of us were royalty and others of us were servants. Papa started off as a benevolent ruler, but quickly started bossing people around, saying "I LIKE BEING IN CHARGE!!!"

I told Papa that he needed to be careful or he would become a tyrant and the people might rebel.  He scoffed and replied that that would never happen because he's in charge.

Me:  Happened to Julius Caesar... (and proceeded to explain what happened to he that would be the end of the Roman Republic.)

Absolute power corrupts absolutely, y'all...

Homeward Bound

After much deliberation, we've made the decision to homeschool our children next year.  There were a lot of factors playing into this decision, and we're very excitedly dorking out looking at microscopes that we can have for our home school setting.  :-)

It's February vacation, and the horde has already jumped in with both feet to learning at home.  This morning we looked up systems of classification for living things, and had the boys excitedly yelling out "CHORDATA!" for what animals have spinal cords, trying to climb the walls like anthropods, being mushy mollusks, and squirming on the ground like the annelida worms.  Straight from there we went to writing exercises where Papa Bear independently wrote 2 paragraphs about mollusks and Yogi Bear dictated to me information about athropods.

Here's Yogi's story:

"Hi, my name is Exoskeleton, and I am an arthropod.  Arthropods are different phylums from other animals and other kingdoms, even different from the plant kingdom.  Even different from annelida, the worms, and mushy mollusks.  Because I am an arthropod, I have an exoskeleton.  It is like outside armor bones.  Animals that are athropods are insects that can climb on walls, spiders, and crabs.  To get rid of an arthropod, you step on it, because that cracks its exoskeleton."

Not bad for a kindergartener!  He had some help, obviously, but this was largely his work with my typing and some mild direction.

So, homeschooling readers, how do you structure things?  We're pretty old school and plan on following Classical education principles, but switching it up by keeping a giant question jar and talking over one question per day at dinner time.

Goldilocks turns FOUR today!

This Post Brought to you by the color PINK!  And Princesses!  And JEWELS!  


Happy Birthday, Goldilocks!

This post brought to you by sleep deprivation...

Question 1: Is there enough coffee in the world?

Obj 1.  There is a coffee maker in the kitchen, and a giant can of ground coffee, therefore there must be enough coffee in the world.

Obj 2.  Even should there be no coffee in the house, there is coffee in virtually unlimited supply at the grocery store.  Therefore, there is sufficient coffee in the world.

Obj 3.  Even should it be impractical to get into the store, there is coffee at the drive through at McDonalds, Dunkin Donuts and various sundry purveyors of caffeineation of one's choosing, therefore surely there is enough coffee in the world.

Sed Contra...  "Man shall not live by bread alone."  and "NEED.  COFFEE.  NOW!!!!"

I respond, there are those who say that there is sufficient coffee in the world, if only one is industrious enough to reach it.  However, there is one serious impediment in the life of caffeination when it comes to accessing this beverage which aids the helpless in such a manner which inspires deep reflection on Man's reliance on God.  This impediment is known as the 2 year old boy.  Thus while coffee would appear to be limitless and easily within grasp, so easily we fail to obtain it, moaning and weeping that there is coffee, coffee everywhere but not a cup to sip.

Reply to Obj 1.  The giant can of ground coffee in the kitchen cannot be accessed when the 2 year old boy is eagerly plotting to color his baby sister orange with hot pink polka dots at the earliest opportunity.

Reply to Obj 2.  Clearly the person making this objection hasn't seen a 2 year old boy in a grocery store, and has not considered that taking small children out of the house requires caffeination beforehand.

Reply to Obj 3.  Still have to get the 2 year old out the door to get to the drive through, and if you get a mommy a coffee, her son will want a donut to go with it, and the ensuing sugar buzz will bring on the apocalypse.

This is Why I'm Going To Have 50 Gazillion Kids 2/5/2011

Because I would NEVER HAVE KNOWN that eggs should be cleaned in the dishwasher!

I was unloading the dishwasher (with Thumbelina on my back) and while putting away the last dishes, I saw something odd in the corner of the dishwasher.  On closer inspection, it was in fact an egg.  So, I called over Baby Bear and said "why is there an egg in the dishwasher?" to which he yelled the reply "NOT MEEEEEEE!!!"

I grabbed the camera and called Gil over, and he asked Baby Bear...

Gil: "Did you put the egg in the dishwasher?"
Baby Bear: "Yeaaaaahhhhh."
Me: "Why did you do that?"
Baby Bear: "I want it to be clean!!"

If I hadn't embarked on this quest to have 50 gazillion kids, I would never have known that the dishwasher is the place where eggs should be cleaned!  Good thing we're going to have 50 gazillion kids.

This is why I'm going to have 50 gazillion kids 1/18

Large Family Life:  If you're small enough, there's always someone else willing to pull your pants on for you.  Or two "someone elses."

You know you have a large family when...

You order a Rapid Strep Test Kit from Amazon and know that you will more than recoup the costs in saved co-pays each year. 

Can you tell we've been hit by *gasp* DEATHSTREP!?!?  And mobile Thumbelina!  She crawls AND stands!  Not quite time for an update to the horde, but geez... our little girl isn't quite so tiny anymore!

Hopefully we'll be blogging more soon.